Complicating Relationships

Thought i had everything. Friends, Family, Love. But now its all slowly drifting away. The thing is that i have no clue what's going on. Sometimes i feel like their (besties) better off without me. Nowadays they dont even keep in contact with me. They don't bother to call when im ill or when im not around for days. Do they even care how i feel? Im starting to think not. Before it was just two of us. Then it became three. By this time i was invincible. The two of them would walk off together leaving me by my lonesome. When another one joined in i felt quite happy for atleast i had someone to talk to. But my first bestie began to feel left out because we were all hanging out with the latest one who had just joined us. When she had consulted me about it i told her i felt the same way about the first one. things soon started to look up. But now it looks like its back to the way it was when i was excluded. But im used to it now. Used to being left out. Used to rejections. Used to being used. Nothing new to cry about these days. People will hurt you one way or the other. No use of wasting your tears on them. Even when they say sorry...there will always be a time when they were never sorry at all. Anyone can say it. You can just never tell whether they mean it or not. Trust me, they will hurt you over and over again. All you gotta do is just shut them out of your life. For me, it'll be hard. Time will tell if im doing the right thing. Live without them...maybe not. But i've gotta try.

What guys don't know, but need to

When i run away from you
-Follow me

When i pout my lips
-Kiss me

When i kick
-Hug me tight

When i call you crazy
-I'm crazy about you

When i'm silent
-Im thinking of how to say i love you

When i ignore you
-I want all your attention

When i pull away
-Grab me by the waist and tell me you'll never let me go

When you see me at my worst
-Tell me im beautiful

When i scream
-Tell me you love me

When you see me walking
-Sneek up behind and hug me

If i dont call you
-Im waiting by the phone for your call

When i say i dont care
-I do care

When im scared
-Hold me tight

When i look like something's the matter
-Kiss me and tell me everything's alrite

When i hold your hands
-Play with my fingers